Thursday, May 07, 2009

Spoof: Cleopatra's Tomb Found

American Chronicle (Dan Liftman)

Egyptian archaeologists startled the world yesterday with their announcement that they have located the tomb of Anthony and Cleopatra. It was long thought that the final resting place of the famous lovers from thousands of years ago would never be found.

Abu Ben-bella, Director of Egypt´s National Antiquities Office told Reuters International that, after an exhausting ten-year-long search, the tomb was uncovered in an area about 15 miles west of Cairo. Ben-bella amazed the world with initial reports of artifacts found alongside the sarcophagi of Egypt´s most famous queen and her lover.

It is known that Egyptian royals were commonly buried with items they hoped to take with them into the next life. Now, there is strong evidence that the ancient civilization was far more advanced than previously imagined. Along with perfume bottles and jewelry, Ben-Bella showed astonished reporters a hair dryer buried with Cleopatra.

Items buried alongside Anthony included an electric guitar, a motorcycle and a flat screen TV. Skeptical reporters were also shown a waffle iron found near Cleopatra and a cellular phone that was buried with Anthony. The real shock came when Ben-Bella pressed a number on the phone´s keypad. It was clearly heard ringing, and soon, a man answered, announcing "Ahmed´s Real New York Pizza."


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